~ If the witch invites you to her dinner party don't go wearing a sari. She will laugh and laugh and laugh at you for being such a country bumpkin.
~ When she offers you a choice between vodka and whiskey don't say Sprite. Accept the booze and pour it down a sink when her back is turned or she will laugh and laugh and laugh at you for being such a country bumpkin.
~ Then the music will begin. If you won't dance with her husband or her brother she will laugh and laugh and laugh at you for being such a country bumpkin.
~ When every one is flushed with alcohol and exercise the joint will get passed around. Smoke but don't inhale or she will laugh and laugh and laugh at you for being such a country bumpkin.
~ Should you choose to go home with your husband she will laugh and laugh and laugh at you for being such a country bumpkin.
~ Take a good close look at her and you will realize she is exactly the country bumpkin she loves to laugh at. She don't read or write too well, can't cook to save her life, needs her beedi and tharra every day, and dances like a zulu warrior.
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