She Needs Her Grass Cut

Every neighborhood a certain size has at least one resident like this one.
Even the "Desperate Housewives" had one in Eva Longoria's Gabrielle Solis.
Well, we have one too.
Except she cuts her own grass, in a Nike skort, a sports bra, and high heels.
She mows her front yard every day nearly, for a few minutes, either sometime between 8:45 a.m. and 9:30 a.m. or between 5:45 p.m. and 7 p.m.
There is no stop sign or "SLOW" sign along her yard but a lot of cars just simply crawl the couple of hundred feet there.
Some of the ladies are getting very upset about it all.

You Are Who You Fuck

Hey Gullible! No body hates you. It's the witch you are dating we dislike. As long as you are dating her, self-respecting folk are going to move away from you. In a year or two all you'll have in your circle of friends is a bunch of assholes and their respective gullibles. You are not a "boy friend". You are a dupe. But only until you figure that out. It won't be easy losing the witch, unless you can introduce her to some one wealthier than you who takes a shine to her. It might just be worth the effort. Any ways, we feel your pain, and we wish you well.
                                                                                                                                    ~ SDG

Bolt From The Blue

          Witch to moi, first thing on a beautiful morning, "I am a very good person. I never hate any one more talented than myself."
          And she walked off in a huff.

maine hoton se lagayi toh hungama ho gaya

Witch can't stop talking about my neighbor baking a rum cake.
Witch sees a bottle of rum, she drinks up half of it.
This is not a case of the pot calling the kettle black, so what idom would cover this situation?

A Sad Twist On Self Confidence

There's an ugly side to self esteem.
Some people have too much of it, or plenty of it, and no conscience whatsoever.
Sooner or later they turn into pimps.

So never forget, witch = pimp.
She believes in herself, loves herself, knows how to talk, and uses it all to harm others.

Yuck, get that thing away from me!!!

Trying to understand a witch's mind "is like trying to pick up a turd from the clean end".
Most people give up too soon, which is why witches get away with abuse far too long.